Have you ever wondered why alcoholics and smokers (or any other addicts for the matter) find it hard to quit their addiction? The main reason lies in the fact that not only they are trying to get rid of the physical addiction but they are also attempting to kick the habit at the very same time.
As the old saying goes: "Old habits die hard." and habit energy (as Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh terms it) can be a very powerful force. The energy and its momentum has been reinforced and accumulated over an extended period of time, seeds watered constantly and roots grown deep and strong. There is little wonder why most addicts will find it an uphill task and a struggle in their process of ridding their addiction.
This is when the practice of mindfulness can help to lessen and weaken the habit energy. Of course, the weakening and uprooting of the habit energy will not happen overnight. Like how the seeds of the habit had been watered and strengthened over time, it will too, take time for the energy to weaken.
How can the practice of mindfulness help? When we are mindful, we will know when the craving arises and when it arise, we can then mindfully take of it. We do not run or turn away from the sudden craving, instead we acknowledge it. At the same time we also recognise that we do not have to give in to the addiction and habit energy for the matter and realise with wisdom that the craving will pass, such is the law of impermanence.
Once we are able to do that, the craving will no longer hold sway and the habit energy naturally weakens a little. And as we practice more mindfulness, the habit energy will weaken a little more each time we practice earnestly and in time, the addiction will wear off and the habit energy dwindles down to such a weaken state that it can hardly be felt. At this point, we will know that we have successfully conquer our addictions, our bad habits.
Thursday, 17 March 2011
Monday, 31 January 2011
Blessings
Although the previous 2 weeks did not start out too well but nothing in essence is permanent. There is not one thing in this world that is not in a constant flux. And for this very reason when things are bleak, keeping this truth in mind can empower us with the ability to look beyond our current pain and suffering, to the future horizon with hope that things may change for better.
However, we have to be realistic here - though we can hope and work with our utmost efforts toward a better future, it does not necessarily guarantee one. Yet by doing nothing, resigning to the "fate" and living our lives in despair, is the most unkind thing we can ever do to ourselves, for that would simply implied we failed before we even tried. To surmise, there is no guaranteed success but failure is imminent if we do not even attempt at the betterment of our lives.
And so 2 week has gone by and being fairly fruitful in both material and spiritual sense. Materially fruitful as i went for the first job interview for a project manager role in a finance department (that may ultimately transform into a proper management reporting role in 2 years time) and sent out my resume to another headhunter from another HR agency who requested a latest copy of it.
On the other hand, i received spiritual blessings from Sister who dedicated some of her merits to me in good wishes that i will successfully land in a better job that will allow me to enjoy more time to improve my own spiritual life and health. She reminded me again that earning a lesser pay should not be a concern as long as one can make sure our health, both physical and mental are well taken care of and with time for spiritual developments.
No arguments with that especially not from me when i have used up all my sick leave last year and even had to cover some of the days that i'm sick with my share of annual leave.
However, we have to be realistic here - though we can hope and work with our utmost efforts toward a better future, it does not necessarily guarantee one. Yet by doing nothing, resigning to the "fate" and living our lives in despair, is the most unkind thing we can ever do to ourselves, for that would simply implied we failed before we even tried. To surmise, there is no guaranteed success but failure is imminent if we do not even attempt at the betterment of our lives.
And so 2 week has gone by and being fairly fruitful in both material and spiritual sense. Materially fruitful as i went for the first job interview for a project manager role in a finance department (that may ultimately transform into a proper management reporting role in 2 years time) and sent out my resume to another headhunter from another HR agency who requested a latest copy of it.
On the other hand, i received spiritual blessings from Sister who dedicated some of her merits to me in good wishes that i will successfully land in a better job that will allow me to enjoy more time to improve my own spiritual life and health. She reminded me again that earning a lesser pay should not be a concern as long as one can make sure our health, both physical and mental are well taken care of and with time for spiritual developments.
No arguments with that especially not from me when i have used up all my sick leave last year and even had to cover some of the days that i'm sick with my share of annual leave.
Tuesday, 18 January 2011
In Motion
Come late Feb this year, there will be a significant change to my daily routines. The role of my current job will end officially on 25th Feb and considered fully transited to our colleagues in India.
Depending on how conditions changes each day as it draws nearer to the date, i will either transfer within the firm to place myself with a new role in another department or leave the company for other external opportunties that may yet present themselves. At the moment, as the saying goes, nothing is cast in stone especially so when the future is ever the unknown, the great adventure as i usually like to term it :)
Even though we are not sure how things will end up, there is no need to be passive about the turn of events. In actual fact, we should be doing the exact opposite, to plan and act to our best efforts so that things may turn out for the best and our lives will be the better of it. And when it does not, we know that we did our best and we can hold ourselves in confidence with no regrets and laments.
And what have i done so far? i have been actively on the lookout for internal openings but suffice to say, the pickings are thin at this point in time and the roles available are not what i have in mind. Of course that prompted the next logical course of action, to look outside the firm for suitable opportunities.
Although i only recently put up my resume on efinancials website last week, Cindy from a HR firm called up to arrange a quick meeting. The 1.5hr meeting has been pretty fruitful for the both of us, her knowing more about my work profile and also allowing me to outline what sort of roles i would be interested in. A bonus for both of us, she mentioned that she need a candidate with investment accounting experience and i managed to link her up with Doreen, my former colleague from AXA Re. Hopefully we can all work out something. :)
Depending on how conditions changes each day as it draws nearer to the date, i will either transfer within the firm to place myself with a new role in another department or leave the company for other external opportunties that may yet present themselves. At the moment, as the saying goes, nothing is cast in stone especially so when the future is ever the unknown, the great adventure as i usually like to term it :)
Even though we are not sure how things will end up, there is no need to be passive about the turn of events. In actual fact, we should be doing the exact opposite, to plan and act to our best efforts so that things may turn out for the best and our lives will be the better of it. And when it does not, we know that we did our best and we can hold ourselves in confidence with no regrets and laments.
And what have i done so far? i have been actively on the lookout for internal openings but suffice to say, the pickings are thin at this point in time and the roles available are not what i have in mind. Of course that prompted the next logical course of action, to look outside the firm for suitable opportunities.
Although i only recently put up my resume on efinancials website last week, Cindy from a HR firm called up to arrange a quick meeting. The 1.5hr meeting has been pretty fruitful for the both of us, her knowing more about my work profile and also allowing me to outline what sort of roles i would be interested in. A bonus for both of us, she mentioned that she need a candidate with investment accounting experience and i managed to link her up with Doreen, my former colleague from AXA Re. Hopefully we can all work out something. :)
Friday, 14 January 2011
Not Your Traditional Goodie Two Shoes
Not your traditional heroes in DragonBall but they played a part in protecting Earth :)
Wednesday, 12 January 2011
Monday, 10 January 2011
Thursday, 9 December 2010
Availability of Pure Land and Kingdom of God
Last thursday, a good friend of mine, Xuezhen posted a message in Facebook via the application 'God wants You to Know' and the message went, "On this day, God wants you to know that your pilgrimage to God is your pilgrimage to yourself. It's never too late to start and it's never too soon to take one more step on your pilgrimage." and she wondered what it meant.
When i read this post, it popped into my mind almost instantaneously what Thay Thich Nhat Hanh mentioned extensively in his books and Dhamma talks, the Here and Now. He talked about Amitabha Buddha's Pure Land and how it can be achieved here in this very present moment, in the Here and Now and all of us can do so by simply residing in this very present moment.
When we are here and now, mindful and fully aware of the present moment without being distracted by the past and future, the mind does not crave or cling. Mind settles down bit by bit, becoming calm and peaceful, naturally free of worries and anxieties. Without any unwholesome thoughts, our minds are clear and our hearts light. We are happy, we are blissful and we have already arrived in Pure Land.
Thay could not have said it better - a quote from him, "If you practice correctly, you know the Buddha is already in your own heart, that God is already in your own heart. You can see that the Pure Land, that the Buddha is right here in your own heart. God is not somewhere else. If you study the Christian mystics, you can see that God is right here. In Plum Village we have often said, 'The Pure Land is here and now.' Nirvana is not a realm you attain after you die. Nirvana is something that is available right here and now. We have to put nirvana in the right place: right here and right now. Nirvana is here and now."
In the same spirit, i left a comment on her post that from what i understood, our friends of the Christian faith has the belief that we are made in the image of God. And therefore the Kingdom of God is available in the present moment and within ourselves. If we understand and have faith in that, there is no need to search outwardly for a path to the Gates of Heaven and we only simply need to look within ourselves and journey inwards to be with Him in his Heavenly Palace.
In Thay's recent tour in Southeast Asia during September this year, he stopped by Singapore and held a 5 day retreat in Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery. During the retreat, he held a Dhamma talk one of the evenings that was opened to the members of public. I had the good fortune to attend it and for that i have to thank Ryan who had a spare ticket. During the talk, Thay spoke of how Pure Land and Kingdom of God can be achieved in the here and now.
With good humour, he spoke of how we carry portable entertainment devices such as IPods, mobile phones and e-book readers to bring happiness to ourselves everywhere we go. And for him, he too has portable enjoyment, portable happiness that he brings everywhere he goes - his Portable Pure Land. And i know his portable happiness is way better than any of ours. IPods, mobile phones and e-book readers can run out of battery or breakdown due to wear and tear, rendering fustration but Portable Pure Land requires no batteries and will not wear out due to usage. In fact, the more you practice and use Pure Land, the more vivid it becomes, the more vibrant it will be. Seems like Thay has the better version of portable happiness. =)
So have we practiced mindfulness today and have you brought your Portable Pure Land, Portable Kingdom of God with you? If you have not, let's rest a moment and touch base with ourselves to enter Pure Land, to enter the Kingdom of God.
When i read this post, it popped into my mind almost instantaneously what Thay Thich Nhat Hanh mentioned extensively in his books and Dhamma talks, the Here and Now. He talked about Amitabha Buddha's Pure Land and how it can be achieved here in this very present moment, in the Here and Now and all of us can do so by simply residing in this very present moment.
When we are here and now, mindful and fully aware of the present moment without being distracted by the past and future, the mind does not crave or cling. Mind settles down bit by bit, becoming calm and peaceful, naturally free of worries and anxieties. Without any unwholesome thoughts, our minds are clear and our hearts light. We are happy, we are blissful and we have already arrived in Pure Land.
Thay could not have said it better - a quote from him, "If you practice correctly, you know the Buddha is already in your own heart, that God is already in your own heart. You can see that the Pure Land, that the Buddha is right here in your own heart. God is not somewhere else. If you study the Christian mystics, you can see that God is right here. In Plum Village we have often said, 'The Pure Land is here and now.' Nirvana is not a realm you attain after you die. Nirvana is something that is available right here and now. We have to put nirvana in the right place: right here and right now. Nirvana is here and now."
In the same spirit, i left a comment on her post that from what i understood, our friends of the Christian faith has the belief that we are made in the image of God. And therefore the Kingdom of God is available in the present moment and within ourselves. If we understand and have faith in that, there is no need to search outwardly for a path to the Gates of Heaven and we only simply need to look within ourselves and journey inwards to be with Him in his Heavenly Palace.
In Thay's recent tour in Southeast Asia during September this year, he stopped by Singapore and held a 5 day retreat in Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery. During the retreat, he held a Dhamma talk one of the evenings that was opened to the members of public. I had the good fortune to attend it and for that i have to thank Ryan who had a spare ticket. During the talk, Thay spoke of how Pure Land and Kingdom of God can be achieved in the here and now.
With good humour, he spoke of how we carry portable entertainment devices such as IPods, mobile phones and e-book readers to bring happiness to ourselves everywhere we go. And for him, he too has portable enjoyment, portable happiness that he brings everywhere he goes - his Portable Pure Land. And i know his portable happiness is way better than any of ours. IPods, mobile phones and e-book readers can run out of battery or breakdown due to wear and tear, rendering fustration but Portable Pure Land requires no batteries and will not wear out due to usage. In fact, the more you practice and use Pure Land, the more vivid it becomes, the more vibrant it will be. Seems like Thay has the better version of portable happiness. =)
So have we practiced mindfulness today and have you brought your Portable Pure Land, Portable Kingdom of God with you? If you have not, let's rest a moment and touch base with ourselves to enter Pure Land, to enter the Kingdom of God.
Tuesday, 16 November 2010
Sunday, 15 August 2010
Listen, its Blessings
With the recent happenings, i consider it a blessing among friends who are able to lend one another a listening ear, to offer one another some form of support that the other parties might need during these times. Although there might be little that friends can actually do for each other but just the fact of being able to be there in the present moment alone can touch the other party both emotionally and mentally, providing them the strength to pick themselves up quicker than having little or no support at all.
It is no doubt having to face the situation where the current job is no longer secured and the prospect of not being able to find some other work (be it within or without the current firm), there will be a sense of insecurity and loss of direction for some while there will be others who are able to compose themselves quickly and move along. To some degree, those who were able to take the news with some light heartedness are probably the ones who recognised right from start that this job is going to end someday no matter what. It is with only by arming ourselves with the understanding of impermanence that we will realise that this job or any jobs (past or future or even anything for the matter) will end at some point in time.
After all, change is the only constant and that is the truth that no one can refute. Why are people then so upset about losing their jobs? Countless reasons but the bottomline, these reasons are based on attachments and ignorance.
A recent dhamma talk by Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh pretty much summed up how we can face the prospects of losing our jobs in a much more positive way. He said, "Many of us are afraid that we cannot continue with the living style that we have because of the economic crisis. And that fear is an obstacle. It does not allow us to be happy. If we can remove that fear, then happiness will be possible, rightaway, even if we have to live a little bit more simply."
To that i must say, my friends Evelyn and Xuezhen lived very much by that guideline, pretty unfazed at losing their jobs or changing to a whole new industry or type of job that they truly believed they will be happier in. So i truly wish that my current colleagues and friends will be able to free themselves of such job related fears and worries and their hearts will smile much brighter =)
It is no doubt having to face the situation where the current job is no longer secured and the prospect of not being able to find some other work (be it within or without the current firm), there will be a sense of insecurity and loss of direction for some while there will be others who are able to compose themselves quickly and move along. To some degree, those who were able to take the news with some light heartedness are probably the ones who recognised right from start that this job is going to end someday no matter what. It is with only by arming ourselves with the understanding of impermanence that we will realise that this job or any jobs (past or future or even anything for the matter) will end at some point in time.
After all, change is the only constant and that is the truth that no one can refute. Why are people then so upset about losing their jobs? Countless reasons but the bottomline, these reasons are based on attachments and ignorance.
A recent dhamma talk by Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh pretty much summed up how we can face the prospects of losing our jobs in a much more positive way. He said, "Many of us are afraid that we cannot continue with the living style that we have because of the economic crisis. And that fear is an obstacle. It does not allow us to be happy. If we can remove that fear, then happiness will be possible, rightaway, even if we have to live a little bit more simply."
To that i must say, my friends Evelyn and Xuezhen lived very much by that guideline, pretty unfazed at losing their jobs or changing to a whole new industry or type of job that they truly believed they will be happier in. So i truly wish that my current colleagues and friends will be able to free themselves of such job related fears and worries and their hearts will smile much brighter =)
Monday, 14 June 2010
Good Health - 4 Sublime States of Mind, A Logical Approach
A casual conversation over drinks at Coffee Club with Ryan, Lorine and Cecilia after watching Unmistaken Child on Saturday night at Cathay. During the short coffee chat, Lorine mentioned how one of her friends regained much better health after constantly generating merits.
The approach taken by the friend to generate merits includes setting captivated animals free and reciting a specific buddhist mantra frequently, consistently. Although some may have felt that there were unseen forces at work such as devas (heavenly beings) surrounding the person with blessings when they commit such meritorious acts, i like to take it in a very logical approach ~ to make it more commonplace and how buddhism can be seen in a very practical light with no mysticism surrounding it, how it can relate and be incorporated into our daily lives.
First of all, i do not refute the existence of devas and other unseen, unknown karmic forces can be at work but i cannot explain or answer to others what i do not know or have no experience in. A zen master once answered his student when his student enquired about afterlife events that he honestly does not know what lies beyond death and can only know on the day of his own passing and this is the kind of earnest answers that we can truly rely on for guiding us towards our own insights.
Secondly, we have to bear in mind the spirit of Kalama Sutta when Buddha taught that any sensible person can decide what teachings can be accepted as true, and not to believe religious teachings just because they claimed to be true, or even through the application of various techniques. Direct knowledge grounded in one's own experience can be called upon. He advised that the words of the wise should be heeded and considered. Not passively accepting but rather, constant questioning and personal testing to identify those truths which we are able to demonstrate to ourselves that it actually reduces our own sufferings and bring about love and happiness.
So let's discern for ourselves and see how committing meritorious acts such as releasing captivated animals, doing donations, reciting mantras, etc can help to promote good health.
In Buddhism, we can find texts on Buddha speaking about the 4 sublime states of mind which is essential for liberation, the sorrow-less bliss, unconditioned happiness. What are these 4 sublime states of mind? They are metta (loving kindness), karuna (compassion), mudita (altrustic joy) and upekkha (equanimity). Medical studies over years have proven time again and again that if our mindset is healthy and positive, our general well being will likely be positive as well. A healthy mental state allows the body to build its immune system, contributing to better overall health and also recover faster when the body is not well. And without a doubt, these 4 sublime states of mind are some of the most positive states of mind a person can cultivate.
So what does meritorious acts have got to do with these states of minds and our well being? Let's consider the facts and motives behind such acts. Take example, releasing of captivated animals, donations of food or medicine for the poor. All these acts stem from the fact that people have an innate wish to do good, a wish rooted in metta (loving kindness) and karuna (compassion) for these examples. And so when participating in such acts, the person's mind naturally rejoice in the thought of the good done for the less fortunate sentient beings. The mind will smile at this on its own accord and a smiling mind promotes happier cells and in turn translating into better well being.
So what about reciting mantra? For some buddhists, they believe that mantra contains powerful transformation powers and can do wondrous things such as generating miracles. Some skeptics will probably think that mantra has no such effects and they are simply words. Let's investigate what a mantra truly is and means.
Mantra can be defined as a word or group of words that are capable of creating transformation, generating miracles. In most cases when an effort is made to chant a mantra continuously, it can help to calm and focus the mind which is in line with the Buddhist teachings to master the mind. It can assist the practitioner to reach equanimity, one of the four sublime states. And a miracle does not have to be something beyond this world, it can be something most ordinary. Sometimes, the most ordinary miracles are truly the ones that are worth treasuring. Especially if reciting the mantra helps to transform the mind of a person from negativity to calmness, that's a miracle in itself. A quote from Ven. Thich Nhat Han that thoroughly illustrate how miracles are found here and now, in each present moment of our daily lives.
“People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child -- our own two eyes. All is a miracle.”
So have you taken a moment today to reside in one of the four sublime mind states to transform your mind, your body with better health and create a miracle for yourself? If you have not, take this opportunity now to just reside in the present moment and enjoy the simplicity of breathing for 3 minutes =)
The approach taken by the friend to generate merits includes setting captivated animals free and reciting a specific buddhist mantra frequently, consistently. Although some may have felt that there were unseen forces at work such as devas (heavenly beings) surrounding the person with blessings when they commit such meritorious acts, i like to take it in a very logical approach ~ to make it more commonplace and how buddhism can be seen in a very practical light with no mysticism surrounding it, how it can relate and be incorporated into our daily lives.
First of all, i do not refute the existence of devas and other unseen, unknown karmic forces can be at work but i cannot explain or answer to others what i do not know or have no experience in. A zen master once answered his student when his student enquired about afterlife events that he honestly does not know what lies beyond death and can only know on the day of his own passing and this is the kind of earnest answers that we can truly rely on for guiding us towards our own insights.
Secondly, we have to bear in mind the spirit of Kalama Sutta when Buddha taught that any sensible person can decide what teachings can be accepted as true, and not to believe religious teachings just because they claimed to be true, or even through the application of various techniques. Direct knowledge grounded in one's own experience can be called upon. He advised that the words of the wise should be heeded and considered. Not passively accepting but rather, constant questioning and personal testing to identify those truths which we are able to demonstrate to ourselves that it actually reduces our own sufferings and bring about love and happiness.
So let's discern for ourselves and see how committing meritorious acts such as releasing captivated animals, doing donations, reciting mantras, etc can help to promote good health.
In Buddhism, we can find texts on Buddha speaking about the 4 sublime states of mind which is essential for liberation, the sorrow-less bliss, unconditioned happiness. What are these 4 sublime states of mind? They are metta (loving kindness), karuna (compassion), mudita (altrustic joy) and upekkha (equanimity). Medical studies over years have proven time again and again that if our mindset is healthy and positive, our general well being will likely be positive as well. A healthy mental state allows the body to build its immune system, contributing to better overall health and also recover faster when the body is not well. And without a doubt, these 4 sublime states of mind are some of the most positive states of mind a person can cultivate.
So what does meritorious acts have got to do with these states of minds and our well being? Let's consider the facts and motives behind such acts. Take example, releasing of captivated animals, donations of food or medicine for the poor. All these acts stem from the fact that people have an innate wish to do good, a wish rooted in metta (loving kindness) and karuna (compassion) for these examples. And so when participating in such acts, the person's mind naturally rejoice in the thought of the good done for the less fortunate sentient beings. The mind will smile at this on its own accord and a smiling mind promotes happier cells and in turn translating into better well being.
So what about reciting mantra? For some buddhists, they believe that mantra contains powerful transformation powers and can do wondrous things such as generating miracles. Some skeptics will probably think that mantra has no such effects and they are simply words. Let's investigate what a mantra truly is and means.
Mantra can be defined as a word or group of words that are capable of creating transformation, generating miracles. In most cases when an effort is made to chant a mantra continuously, it can help to calm and focus the mind which is in line with the Buddhist teachings to master the mind. It can assist the practitioner to reach equanimity, one of the four sublime states. And a miracle does not have to be something beyond this world, it can be something most ordinary. Sometimes, the most ordinary miracles are truly the ones that are worth treasuring. Especially if reciting the mantra helps to transform the mind of a person from negativity to calmness, that's a miracle in itself. A quote from Ven. Thich Nhat Han that thoroughly illustrate how miracles are found here and now, in each present moment of our daily lives.
“People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child -- our own two eyes. All is a miracle.”
So have you taken a moment today to reside in one of the four sublime mind states to transform your mind, your body with better health and create a miracle for yourself? If you have not, take this opportunity now to just reside in the present moment and enjoy the simplicity of breathing for 3 minutes =)
Monday, 31 May 2010
Looking and Not Seeing
The origin of the thoughts and reflections behind this post pretty much came from a recent catch up session with Buddy. We managed to catch Iron Man2 and sat around for some teh terik exchanging recent developments. What never fails to come up during our talks is his little darling princess Erinne (aka my lovely god daughter).
Children are often a source of both joys and worries for parents and that is true no matter how old the child is. You can be 60+ and your Pa or Ma at 90+ and they will still worry for you. That's how great and unconditional the care that our parents have for us. What changes over the years is how we transform into the person we are, and through our actions and with our age, our parents give up more of their controls and influences over us. That's to say, the more responsible we act, the more assured our parents are, the more they will be willing to let go.
Yiting never fails to bring a sense of pride to Buddy's face, she's a quick-witted lass (and not a single person who knows her will deny her that) and Bud's real proud of it. But what's worrying him is also how that little lady is not using it to her advantage. Instead of tapping into that advantage to explore more things, to gain new knowledge, to maximise her potential, she chooses not to, she balks at the very thought of the effort needed from her.
That is definitely one thing that most parents fret over ~ no parent wants to shortchange their kiddo if sky's the limit for them but the children themselves also have to reach out for the sky. If early childhood can be compared to a drama production, the parents are the ones setting the stage, creating the backdrop and providing the scripts. But whether the performance will be a resounding success still depends largely on the actors and actresses, the children themselves have to choose to act and how well they want to act.
Part of our conversation also touched on how Buddy thinks her friends might be having a significant influence on her and that she may be relishing quite a fair bit on peer support/pressure and as the chinese saying goes, 近朱者赤 近墨者黑. The saying is not without its age old wisdom ~ when the environment is conducive, fruits will naturally bear. Just imagine sowing an apple seed in the middle of the desert. Do you think it will grow and bear fruits?
So naturally, to nurture a child to his or her potential, we have to place them in an environment best suited for them so they are allowed the best chances of blossoming. It is definitely better if she can be doing her studies with a group of like minded students so they can encourage each other and spur one another on. Of course we cannot be definite that the child will not do well when shrouded in conditions or environment that is not as conducive (such as having playful friends or nonchalant teachers), time has proven to us that there has been and will continue to have exceptions. But the truth is, we are all social creatures and at such a tender age, without training the mind till it reaches a certain level of mental strength, i must say it will be an uphill task for the child to perform well.
In an example that Bud mentioned, i can see how quick on the feet Yiting can be but in the wrong direction. For comprehension, she simply reads through the passage and when it comes to answering the questions, all she simply does is to look out for keywords in the question and match them to the passage. Once she determines the sentence in the passage that has the same keywords, she just copy that sentence for her answer.
The method itself is not incorrect, just not correctly applied. Had she read through the passage and understood the story or the message of the passage, this method will work well in her favour since she already knows how to look out for key words in the question. She will be able to work out the correct answers (most, if not all) and not just simply copy them word for word. We all know that answers sometimes need to be inferred from several sentences in the passage, that requires some form of thinking, linking and understanding. She became efficient at answering questions but not effective.
She sees word for word, sentence for sentence and does not realise the relationship between the sentences. Relationships are sometimes more crucial to the determination of a situation, a status that the words themselves cannot expressed adequately. What exasperated Bud is that Erinne does not see the relations between the sentences. There isn't much i can do except to offer a listening ear and a little advice to Bud. The responsibilities of educating a child comes mainly from the people that she spend the most time with and that means her parents largely.
I mentioned to him that he can try to use the analogy of Erinne (herself) to explain to her that a sentence can mean more that what is written in itself if it is seen and related with other sentences. What i mean to say is that Erinne is not only just Erinne. She is like a sentence in a passage, the rest of her family members are each a sentence; her family is a passage.
When seen in the context of a family, she is no longer just Erinne, she is also a daughter to her parents, sister to her brother, niece to her uncles and aunties and grandchild to her grandparents. And when we extend beyond the family to her school (another passage), she is a student to her teachers, friend to her classmates and teammate to the rest of her team for her CCA.
In short, she looks at her passage and reads it without truly seeing the passage for all it stands and means for. Speaking of which, that reminds me of a movie, Avatar when the Na'vi says I See You for their greeting. They do not just look at the other person on the surface and acknowledge the visual sight of another being. They read into the other's core being and acknowledge its relationships, its energy flow with the rest of the universe. Haha, guess its something which most of us adults are guilty of, not just the kids. We look but we do not See.
PS: Hope Erinne had a good Birthday over the weekend and no prizes for guessing what i intend to give her for her present =)
Children are often a source of both joys and worries for parents and that is true no matter how old the child is. You can be 60+ and your Pa or Ma at 90+ and they will still worry for you. That's how great and unconditional the care that our parents have for us. What changes over the years is how we transform into the person we are, and through our actions and with our age, our parents give up more of their controls and influences over us. That's to say, the more responsible we act, the more assured our parents are, the more they will be willing to let go.
Yiting never fails to bring a sense of pride to Buddy's face, she's a quick-witted lass (and not a single person who knows her will deny her that) and Bud's real proud of it. But what's worrying him is also how that little lady is not using it to her advantage. Instead of tapping into that advantage to explore more things, to gain new knowledge, to maximise her potential, she chooses not to, she balks at the very thought of the effort needed from her.
That is definitely one thing that most parents fret over ~ no parent wants to shortchange their kiddo if sky's the limit for them but the children themselves also have to reach out for the sky. If early childhood can be compared to a drama production, the parents are the ones setting the stage, creating the backdrop and providing the scripts. But whether the performance will be a resounding success still depends largely on the actors and actresses, the children themselves have to choose to act and how well they want to act.
Part of our conversation also touched on how Buddy thinks her friends might be having a significant influence on her and that she may be relishing quite a fair bit on peer support/pressure and as the chinese saying goes, 近朱者赤 近墨者黑. The saying is not without its age old wisdom ~ when the environment is conducive, fruits will naturally bear. Just imagine sowing an apple seed in the middle of the desert. Do you think it will grow and bear fruits?
So naturally, to nurture a child to his or her potential, we have to place them in an environment best suited for them so they are allowed the best chances of blossoming. It is definitely better if she can be doing her studies with a group of like minded students so they can encourage each other and spur one another on. Of course we cannot be definite that the child will not do well when shrouded in conditions or environment that is not as conducive (such as having playful friends or nonchalant teachers), time has proven to us that there has been and will continue to have exceptions. But the truth is, we are all social creatures and at such a tender age, without training the mind till it reaches a certain level of mental strength, i must say it will be an uphill task for the child to perform well.
In an example that Bud mentioned, i can see how quick on the feet Yiting can be but in the wrong direction. For comprehension, she simply reads through the passage and when it comes to answering the questions, all she simply does is to look out for keywords in the question and match them to the passage. Once she determines the sentence in the passage that has the same keywords, she just copy that sentence for her answer.
The method itself is not incorrect, just not correctly applied. Had she read through the passage and understood the story or the message of the passage, this method will work well in her favour since she already knows how to look out for key words in the question. She will be able to work out the correct answers (most, if not all) and not just simply copy them word for word. We all know that answers sometimes need to be inferred from several sentences in the passage, that requires some form of thinking, linking and understanding. She became efficient at answering questions but not effective.
She sees word for word, sentence for sentence and does not realise the relationship between the sentences. Relationships are sometimes more crucial to the determination of a situation, a status that the words themselves cannot expressed adequately. What exasperated Bud is that Erinne does not see the relations between the sentences. There isn't much i can do except to offer a listening ear and a little advice to Bud. The responsibilities of educating a child comes mainly from the people that she spend the most time with and that means her parents largely.
I mentioned to him that he can try to use the analogy of Erinne (herself) to explain to her that a sentence can mean more that what is written in itself if it is seen and related with other sentences. What i mean to say is that Erinne is not only just Erinne. She is like a sentence in a passage, the rest of her family members are each a sentence; her family is a passage.
When seen in the context of a family, she is no longer just Erinne, she is also a daughter to her parents, sister to her brother, niece to her uncles and aunties and grandchild to her grandparents. And when we extend beyond the family to her school (another passage), she is a student to her teachers, friend to her classmates and teammate to the rest of her team for her CCA.
In short, she looks at her passage and reads it without truly seeing the passage for all it stands and means for. Speaking of which, that reminds me of a movie, Avatar when the Na'vi says I See You for their greeting. They do not just look at the other person on the surface and acknowledge the visual sight of another being. They read into the other's core being and acknowledge its relationships, its energy flow with the rest of the universe. Haha, guess its something which most of us adults are guilty of, not just the kids. We look but we do not See.
PS: Hope Erinne had a good Birthday over the weekend and no prizes for guessing what i intend to give her for her present =)
Friday, 14 May 2010
百万小学堂
If there is a Chinese variety show that i would recommend, it is definitely 百万小学堂 hands down. Its good, clean and fun entertainment for both young and old alike. Where else can you get knowledge in such fun manner with loads of laughter and cute people?
If you have no idea what i'm talking about, tune in to Channel U every wednesday at 8pm to see how artistes try to work their way through various level of Primary School questions to reach the ultimate top prize of NT$100,000. Of course they are provided some aids to help them along the way and these aids comes in small smart packages with cute names like 大力, 小西瓜, 威力, 妞妞 and 丁丁. And if i ever have kids one day, i want a 小西瓜 and a 威力 wahaha
Want to see how they look like, here's the official website 百万小学堂
If you have no idea what i'm talking about, tune in to Channel U every wednesday at 8pm to see how artistes try to work their way through various level of Primary School questions to reach the ultimate top prize of NT$100,000. Of course they are provided some aids to help them along the way and these aids comes in small smart packages with cute names like 大力, 小西瓜, 威力, 妞妞 and 丁丁. And if i ever have kids one day, i want a 小西瓜 and a 威力 wahaha
Want to see how they look like, here's the official website 百万小学堂
Friday, 12 March 2010
Ring! What's that Noise?
Some reflections of sorts on a short msn chat with one of my younger friends who was feeling out of sorts some time back. Below are a couple of points worth mentioning. Couldn't really find the time to post this up last few weeks due to commitments at work until now.
1. What is a good education? I have never truly ponder over this until my retreat when Bhante asked what do we think is good education and i realised i didn't quite know except that a good education is one that prepares and equips you with the necessary tools so you can continue to learn, not just in school but in every situation that you encounter in life. He pretty much went straight to the point. He said a good education is one that makes you realise you do not know everything. And when we do realise that it makes us more humble and more willing to listen and learn.
2. Why does one feel unsettled, restlessness during certain points of our lives? And no matter what we do, it is still there? It's really because we have not found our focus and once we have our focus, we will be able to form a channel for all these energies and naturally, our minds will become more settled. Sometimes, people may think their jobs, their hobbies, their passions are their ultimate focus in life at a particular point in time. At the moment, they may be so immersed into the particular activity that they feel happy, settled, contented.
But in reality, focus change. Focus themselves are impermanent. So, there is no need to be upset when we lose interest or passion in a particular activity. More important, is to understand that the lost of interest will pass as well and it may not be a bad thing if our energy can be used somewhere else for other activities that will lead to betterment of our lives. But of course if the activity helps to better our lives, then give it some thought that we should preserve with it even though the interest may not be there for the moment.
3. Why do people feel lost? As normal people, we have a need to identify who we truly are and why we are here, what is the meaning of life. There are people who may not go through this questioning phase but for some, it can be a real struggle. During these struggles, there are probably times when we ask ourselves who we are and we are hard pressed for an answer. Good news is if we arrived at that, then we at least identified the problem. Without identifying the problem, there can be no solution found. A quote from Venerable Mahinda,
"The true meaning of life lies beyond worldly happiness, beyond material wealth and status. As long as we do not have the wisdom to realise impermanence, unsatisfactoriness and emptiness of worldly things and pursuits, we will always be seeking for meaning. To realise the true purpose and meaning of life, we need patience, perseverance as well as faith and confidence in moral and spiritual values. We need to fulfil our immediate purpose before we can move on to something higher."
So what is our purpose? It changes from time to time, it is never the same, just like the rest of the phenomena. Why so? Simple ~ our desires, our goals and our responsibilities change, nothing stays the same. That's impermanence. As Ven Mahinda stated, we need to fulfil our immediate purpose before we can move on to something higher. This statement is simple yet powerful statement. It is down to earth and applicable to every single one of us.
Say for example when we are kids, for most of us, our immediate purpose was to study and get a good diploma or degree so we can land ourselves a stable job. But as we grow older, our perceptions change along with our needs and wants. So, now having landed in a stable job, our purpose may be to earn enough to sustain ourselves and for some, our parents and families.
So you see, our immediate purpose and responsibilities change as time passes but one thing doesn't change. What is that you ask? Our intentions, our very innate desires and intentions to be well and happy. No one wishes to find themselves in a state of suffering, every single sentient being has the same innate wish to be well and happy. In order to achieve happiness for myself, i strive to better myself, to better others, to try and bring love, peace and joy to people around me.
You might ask why do we need to make others happy when we are searching for happiness for ourselves? Reasoning is pretty simple, we cannot be truly happy unless our surroundings and people around us are too, happy and well. Imagine yourself constantly shrouded by unhappy family members and friends who are constantly plagued by suffering. Imagine a couple constantly arguing and getting into fights, do you think any of the party is happy? So, my intention is to be as selfless as i can and to love both myself and others more and to realise that "i" is no longer "i" and we are all inter connected (or inter-being as Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh terms it) so that i can achieve a state of love, peace and joy for myself and others.
4. Is our basic nature truly selfless? You might ask what if our nature are not that selfless? I have no doubt about it. In everyone, there's a seed of compassion. The only question is if we water this seed within us and take care of it enough so that it will blossom and manifest. So, how do we know if we have this seed within us? Do you feel like crying when u see people in distress when people are suffering? If you do, that is a sign that you have the seed of compassion within you. What you lack, may simply be watering, nurturing of the seed so that it blossoms beautifully.
5) What is meditation? My friend mentioned about seeing a youtube video where a girl was talking about her past lives and how she saw them when she went into deep meditation. She asked me if i experienced it before as she was planning to try out meditation as a form of reaching inwards.
My question ~ is seeing past lives so important? I have never seen any past lives before during my meditation. It is probably because i'm not good with my meditation but seeing or not seeing is not important. We have to understand that those are byproducts and not the true purpose of meditation.
What people do at times is when distressed is to add more noise, more distractions to fill in what's missing instead of making some effort to be calm and quiet. What can i say? Meditation is a way to develop our mind, our awareness. And the truth, for some, meditation can be quite distressing the first few sessions. We may not be able to sit still and our thoughts are flying around and the mind is probably the noisiest place ever.
But that is what meditation does, to allow us to hear these noises, these chattering in our mind, to be aware of them and to understand, to realise that they are impermanent. They arise and they fall like all phenomena. Its only when we recognise and realise that, the mind will become more settled and live in the present moment. Its very much like a lake with muddied water, if we keep stiring it, the soil will never settle, the water will not turn clear. Only when we accept the fact that the soil is there and part of the lake, we will stop stirring the water to clear the mud. It is only when we stop, the soil will settle and the water clears and bottom of the lake seen.
So all in all, meditation doesn't allow us to cope with our issues or cluttered mind or bring away our troubles. What it really does, is to give us a chance to be Aware. =)
1. What is a good education? I have never truly ponder over this until my retreat when Bhante asked what do we think is good education and i realised i didn't quite know except that a good education is one that prepares and equips you with the necessary tools so you can continue to learn, not just in school but in every situation that you encounter in life. He pretty much went straight to the point. He said a good education is one that makes you realise you do not know everything. And when we do realise that it makes us more humble and more willing to listen and learn.
2. Why does one feel unsettled, restlessness during certain points of our lives? And no matter what we do, it is still there? It's really because we have not found our focus and once we have our focus, we will be able to form a channel for all these energies and naturally, our minds will become more settled. Sometimes, people may think their jobs, their hobbies, their passions are their ultimate focus in life at a particular point in time. At the moment, they may be so immersed into the particular activity that they feel happy, settled, contented.
But in reality, focus change. Focus themselves are impermanent. So, there is no need to be upset when we lose interest or passion in a particular activity. More important, is to understand that the lost of interest will pass as well and it may not be a bad thing if our energy can be used somewhere else for other activities that will lead to betterment of our lives. But of course if the activity helps to better our lives, then give it some thought that we should preserve with it even though the interest may not be there for the moment.
3. Why do people feel lost? As normal people, we have a need to identify who we truly are and why we are here, what is the meaning of life. There are people who may not go through this questioning phase but for some, it can be a real struggle. During these struggles, there are probably times when we ask ourselves who we are and we are hard pressed for an answer. Good news is if we arrived at that, then we at least identified the problem. Without identifying the problem, there can be no solution found. A quote from Venerable Mahinda,
"The true meaning of life lies beyond worldly happiness, beyond material wealth and status. As long as we do not have the wisdom to realise impermanence, unsatisfactoriness and emptiness of worldly things and pursuits, we will always be seeking for meaning. To realise the true purpose and meaning of life, we need patience, perseverance as well as faith and confidence in moral and spiritual values. We need to fulfil our immediate purpose before we can move on to something higher."
So what is our purpose? It changes from time to time, it is never the same, just like the rest of the phenomena. Why so? Simple ~ our desires, our goals and our responsibilities change, nothing stays the same. That's impermanence. As Ven Mahinda stated, we need to fulfil our immediate purpose before we can move on to something higher. This statement is simple yet powerful statement. It is down to earth and applicable to every single one of us.
Say for example when we are kids, for most of us, our immediate purpose was to study and get a good diploma or degree so we can land ourselves a stable job. But as we grow older, our perceptions change along with our needs and wants. So, now having landed in a stable job, our purpose may be to earn enough to sustain ourselves and for some, our parents and families.
So you see, our immediate purpose and responsibilities change as time passes but one thing doesn't change. What is that you ask? Our intentions, our very innate desires and intentions to be well and happy. No one wishes to find themselves in a state of suffering, every single sentient being has the same innate wish to be well and happy. In order to achieve happiness for myself, i strive to better myself, to better others, to try and bring love, peace and joy to people around me.
You might ask why do we need to make others happy when we are searching for happiness for ourselves? Reasoning is pretty simple, we cannot be truly happy unless our surroundings and people around us are too, happy and well. Imagine yourself constantly shrouded by unhappy family members and friends who are constantly plagued by suffering. Imagine a couple constantly arguing and getting into fights, do you think any of the party is happy? So, my intention is to be as selfless as i can and to love both myself and others more and to realise that "i" is no longer "i" and we are all inter connected (or inter-being as Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh terms it) so that i can achieve a state of love, peace and joy for myself and others.
4. Is our basic nature truly selfless? You might ask what if our nature are not that selfless? I have no doubt about it. In everyone, there's a seed of compassion. The only question is if we water this seed within us and take care of it enough so that it will blossom and manifest. So, how do we know if we have this seed within us? Do you feel like crying when u see people in distress when people are suffering? If you do, that is a sign that you have the seed of compassion within you. What you lack, may simply be watering, nurturing of the seed so that it blossoms beautifully.
5) What is meditation? My friend mentioned about seeing a youtube video where a girl was talking about her past lives and how she saw them when she went into deep meditation. She asked me if i experienced it before as she was planning to try out meditation as a form of reaching inwards.
My question ~ is seeing past lives so important? I have never seen any past lives before during my meditation. It is probably because i'm not good with my meditation but seeing or not seeing is not important. We have to understand that those are byproducts and not the true purpose of meditation.
What people do at times is when distressed is to add more noise, more distractions to fill in what's missing instead of making some effort to be calm and quiet. What can i say? Meditation is a way to develop our mind, our awareness. And the truth, for some, meditation can be quite distressing the first few sessions. We may not be able to sit still and our thoughts are flying around and the mind is probably the noisiest place ever.
But that is what meditation does, to allow us to hear these noises, these chattering in our mind, to be aware of them and to understand, to realise that they are impermanent. They arise and they fall like all phenomena. Its only when we recognise and realise that, the mind will become more settled and live in the present moment. Its very much like a lake with muddied water, if we keep stiring it, the soil will never settle, the water will not turn clear. Only when we accept the fact that the soil is there and part of the lake, we will stop stirring the water to clear the mud. It is only when we stop, the soil will settle and the water clears and bottom of the lake seen.
So all in all, meditation doesn't allow us to cope with our issues or cluttered mind or bring away our troubles. What it really does, is to give us a chance to be Aware. =)
Saturday, 13 February 2010
Where's the Joy?
This post is prompted by a recent chance meeting in the train with one of my ex-camp mates while going to work. One of the times i saw him was a couple of years back when he just graduated and searching for a job.
Back then, he's already had his fair share of complains and apparently that hasn't changed much. We had about 3 or 4 chance meetings so far since we completed our national services and haha, come to think of it, he's the one doing most of the talking during these chance meetings.
If my memory serves me right, he was grumbling about not getting a job despite having a degree and going through so many rounds of interviews. And after trying to get a job for more than half a year and leading nowhere, he decided to give up his search and try his luck going into business. And what kind of business, i have absolutely no idea and can't recall the slightest notion.
And sometime later, he dabbled into freelance photography and is now a full time photographer. This time round, he was complaining about the photographers' market and how freelancers are undercutting the market esp those who does actual day wedding photography. Then he went on to complain about taking on assignments for companies and how they refuse to pay up after he completed their assignments and delivered the end products.
Of course i did not have much to comment except to say that we can learn to wise up with past experiences. He can now be more careful and more mindful with his dealings so that he does not fall into such situations again. And to that his reply was that he now has his own methods in dealing with people like this ~ he gets them to enter a written agreement and have them put down their thumbprints so that they cannot deny by saying that their signatures have been forged. To that, i did not comment further - afterall, when one has nothing good or helpful to say, say nothing at all.
And currently, he's into taking photographs for nightlife events, mainly events held in clubs. And to prevent people from trespassing into his niche market, he professed doing his takes with a certain style and not just concentrate on shooting "zar bor" (hokkien word for women) that grace the event, unlike some other photographers. Right now, he noticed that some newbies actually follow him around and try to copy what he is shooting. He absolutely hates that and he finds that behaviour so typical of the locals, to just try and copy someone's work whenever they can.
And i went, "You don't sound happy with your current line of work at all. Have you considered changing your line or changing the environment you are working in?" He insisted to me that he is really happy with his current work, just not the people that he's dealing with.
Of course, i'm not convinced he's happy, not in the slightest bit at all. I could not sense the happiness he mentioned from him. So i asked again, "Are you sure you are happy cos you really sound unhappy to me at all." And he stuck to his earlier reply - he's only unhappy with the people he have to deal with in his line of work.
Little does he realise that life is a package, you cannot take what you like and reject what you don't. Be it good or bad, they come together ~ just like the sign of Ying and Yang ~ there cannot be good without bad and neither could there be bad without good. Afterall, how can he take on event photography for nightlife events and not deal with the people who provides the very event itself, the very opportunity for him to take the pictures he profess to love so much?
So i reflected and a question arises - Where's the Joy? Joy will only manifest when one realised that suffering stems from 3 destructive roots, Hatred, Greed and Ignorance. And when we do, we learn to recognise these 3 roots and transform them to the 3 constructive roots, Love, Generosity and Wisdom. Once our mind is transformed to dwell on the 3 constructive roots, joy naturally arises on its own accord since the supporting conditions are conducive.
Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh once said during an interview that the start of the cessation of suffering is also the start of the manifestation of great happiness. So how can the cessation of suffering come about? That we can relate back to the 4 Noble Truths that Buddha taught more than 2500 years ago.
First Noble Truth ~ There is Suffering. We must learn to recognise that we are suffering. Like any problem solving skills we develop or learn, the very first step is always to recognise the problem; simple logic and pure common sense will at least affirm that much.
Without first recognising the problem, we will not be able to move on to the second step, to determine the cause of the problem, which in this case also happens to be the Second Noble Truth ~ There is a Cause to Suffering. And now that we are able to determine the cause of the problem, can the problem be solved, automatically becomes the next question. And yes, we can transform Suffering and that will be the Third Noble Truth - There is Cessation to Suffering.
Last but not least, is there a way or method to end our suffering, to transform suffering into happiness? That will be the Fourth Noble Truth - There is a Path leading to Cessation of Suffering. What path are we talking about then? The Noble Eightfold Path as prescribed by the Buddha.
Why the Noble Eightfold Path? There are many reasons why we should choose to walk this path and it differs for each individual but ultimately there is but one common reason every person who walk this path shares ~ it brings happiness. Of course there are other things that bring joy and happiness but why in particular this Nobe Eightfold Path? That we have to first know and understand what Suffering is and what makes up this path.
So let's take a look at the word Suffering. What is Suffering? It is the state that a person is in when he or she is distressed. And suffering comes in many forms but for the moment, we can classify them into 3 main types of suffering, namely physical suffering, mental suffering and emotional suffering. But what really is Suffering? And most of the time, people tend to suffer more than what is really necessary. Why so? Simply because there is attachment and ignorance.
To illustrate this point, let's think of a scenario when we have to see a dentist to remove a decayed tooth. For some people, even before stepping into the clinic, they start to worry and imagine the whole process, the pain of anaesthetic jab, the pain from removing the decayed tooth. They cannot concentrate on the present moment, their thoughts constantly on the pain to come and they feel uptight and jittery. So how long did the pain last? In truth, probably no more than a few minutes. Yet, before the pain arrives, the person is already distressed. Now, that is Suffering.
Now that we know what Suffering is, let's take a look at the Path and what makes it up and how it can bring happiness and end Suffering. As the name suggests, there are eight components to it and they are:
With Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livelihood, we change our environment and associate with people that will make it conducive for us to develop further both mentally and spiritual. This in turn leads to Right Mindfulnes, Right Effort and Right Concentration.
And what happens when we are more developed mentally and spiritually? It affirms our views and thoughts and so our conviction is stronger and what do we have then? "Stronger" Right Views and Right Thoughts and which in leads again to "Stronger" Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livelihood and it goes to creating "Stronger" Right Mindfulnes, Right Effort and Right Concentration.
With that, our mind becomes calmer and the 3 roots, Love, Generosity and Wisdom will grow deeper and deeper. What happen to us then? Needless to say, we become more loving, more generous and wiser and here comes the Joy.
Back then, he's already had his fair share of complains and apparently that hasn't changed much. We had about 3 or 4 chance meetings so far since we completed our national services and haha, come to think of it, he's the one doing most of the talking during these chance meetings.
If my memory serves me right, he was grumbling about not getting a job despite having a degree and going through so many rounds of interviews. And after trying to get a job for more than half a year and leading nowhere, he decided to give up his search and try his luck going into business. And what kind of business, i have absolutely no idea and can't recall the slightest notion.
And sometime later, he dabbled into freelance photography and is now a full time photographer. This time round, he was complaining about the photographers' market and how freelancers are undercutting the market esp those who does actual day wedding photography. Then he went on to complain about taking on assignments for companies and how they refuse to pay up after he completed their assignments and delivered the end products.
Of course i did not have much to comment except to say that we can learn to wise up with past experiences. He can now be more careful and more mindful with his dealings so that he does not fall into such situations again. And to that his reply was that he now has his own methods in dealing with people like this ~ he gets them to enter a written agreement and have them put down their thumbprints so that they cannot deny by saying that their signatures have been forged. To that, i did not comment further - afterall, when one has nothing good or helpful to say, say nothing at all.
And currently, he's into taking photographs for nightlife events, mainly events held in clubs. And to prevent people from trespassing into his niche market, he professed doing his takes with a certain style and not just concentrate on shooting "zar bor" (hokkien word for women) that grace the event, unlike some other photographers. Right now, he noticed that some newbies actually follow him around and try to copy what he is shooting. He absolutely hates that and he finds that behaviour so typical of the locals, to just try and copy someone's work whenever they can.
And i went, "You don't sound happy with your current line of work at all. Have you considered changing your line or changing the environment you are working in?" He insisted to me that he is really happy with his current work, just not the people that he's dealing with.
Of course, i'm not convinced he's happy, not in the slightest bit at all. I could not sense the happiness he mentioned from him. So i asked again, "Are you sure you are happy cos you really sound unhappy to me at all." And he stuck to his earlier reply - he's only unhappy with the people he have to deal with in his line of work.
Little does he realise that life is a package, you cannot take what you like and reject what you don't. Be it good or bad, they come together ~ just like the sign of Ying and Yang ~ there cannot be good without bad and neither could there be bad without good. Afterall, how can he take on event photography for nightlife events and not deal with the people who provides the very event itself, the very opportunity for him to take the pictures he profess to love so much?
So i reflected and a question arises - Where's the Joy? Joy will only manifest when one realised that suffering stems from 3 destructive roots, Hatred, Greed and Ignorance. And when we do, we learn to recognise these 3 roots and transform them to the 3 constructive roots, Love, Generosity and Wisdom. Once our mind is transformed to dwell on the 3 constructive roots, joy naturally arises on its own accord since the supporting conditions are conducive.
Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh once said during an interview that the start of the cessation of suffering is also the start of the manifestation of great happiness. So how can the cessation of suffering come about? That we can relate back to the 4 Noble Truths that Buddha taught more than 2500 years ago.
First Noble Truth ~ There is Suffering. We must learn to recognise that we are suffering. Like any problem solving skills we develop or learn, the very first step is always to recognise the problem; simple logic and pure common sense will at least affirm that much.
Without first recognising the problem, we will not be able to move on to the second step, to determine the cause of the problem, which in this case also happens to be the Second Noble Truth ~ There is a Cause to Suffering. And now that we are able to determine the cause of the problem, can the problem be solved, automatically becomes the next question. And yes, we can transform Suffering and that will be the Third Noble Truth - There is Cessation to Suffering.
Last but not least, is there a way or method to end our suffering, to transform suffering into happiness? That will be the Fourth Noble Truth - There is a Path leading to Cessation of Suffering. What path are we talking about then? The Noble Eightfold Path as prescribed by the Buddha.
Why the Noble Eightfold Path? There are many reasons why we should choose to walk this path and it differs for each individual but ultimately there is but one common reason every person who walk this path shares ~ it brings happiness. Of course there are other things that bring joy and happiness but why in particular this Nobe Eightfold Path? That we have to first know and understand what Suffering is and what makes up this path.
So let's take a look at the word Suffering. What is Suffering? It is the state that a person is in when he or she is distressed. And suffering comes in many forms but for the moment, we can classify them into 3 main types of suffering, namely physical suffering, mental suffering and emotional suffering. But what really is Suffering? And most of the time, people tend to suffer more than what is really necessary. Why so? Simply because there is attachment and ignorance.
To illustrate this point, let's think of a scenario when we have to see a dentist to remove a decayed tooth. For some people, even before stepping into the clinic, they start to worry and imagine the whole process, the pain of anaesthetic jab, the pain from removing the decayed tooth. They cannot concentrate on the present moment, their thoughts constantly on the pain to come and they feel uptight and jittery. So how long did the pain last? In truth, probably no more than a few minutes. Yet, before the pain arrives, the person is already distressed. Now, that is Suffering.
Now that we know what Suffering is, let's take a look at the Path and what makes it up and how it can bring happiness and end Suffering. As the name suggests, there are eight components to it and they are:
- Right Views
- Right Thoughts
- Right Speech
- Right Action
- Right Livelihood
- Right Mindfulness
- Right Effort
- Right Concentration
With Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livelihood, we change our environment and associate with people that will make it conducive for us to develop further both mentally and spiritual. This in turn leads to Right Mindfulnes, Right Effort and Right Concentration.
And what happens when we are more developed mentally and spiritually? It affirms our views and thoughts and so our conviction is stronger and what do we have then? "Stronger" Right Views and Right Thoughts and which in leads again to "Stronger" Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livelihood and it goes to creating "Stronger" Right Mindfulnes, Right Effort and Right Concentration.
With that, our mind becomes calmer and the 3 roots, Love, Generosity and Wisdom will grow deeper and deeper. What happen to us then? Needless to say, we become more loving, more generous and wiser and here comes the Joy.
Thursday, 4 February 2010
Retreat at Aloka (Aus)
Went to Australia for a short retreat at Aloka Meditation Centre in Jan. Over there, it was probably one of life's most enriching experiences and lessons gained.
My gratitude to Sister for inviting me to go on a retreat. Over there, she provided me with much guidance on Dhamma and about facing some of my innermost self that i turned away from subconsciously.
Not only that, there were times when Bhante gave small talks which i found both humorous and quick witted and yet at the same time, they were filled with messages that were full of wisdom and insight. Messages that will benefit one for a lifetime to come.
I also like to thank the residents, namely Angelina, Sudhamma, Catherine, Su Liang, Emily and Auntie as they made the extra effort to take care of my special diet as there were lots of stuff that i'm not able to take.
Many people have misgivings about retreats. Some think its lots of fun and enjoyment while some think its all strict and tough. I suppose it depends on the sort of retreat you are attending but the bottom line of a retreat is to get in touch with yourself, to hear yourself, to be mindful of the present moment, to be truly here and now, without any or as little distractions as possible.
Most time, there's morning and evening chanting sessions and thereafter, its individual time for practice with occasional interviews with Sister for guidance. Of course, we also help out with the household chores. Everyone do their part to maintain the place which serves everyone. Most importantly there, we learn to do mindful walking, mindful eating, mindful breathing and just live in the present moment, the true art to living in the present.
Its quite funny how Qin told me what she imagine a retreat will be like and when i relate to her my experience, its like worlds apart and we both had a good laugh out of that.
Oh by the way, i managed to get some shots of the Stupa there with a very blue sky adorning it. Its really quite a sight. Will post them once i'm done with the editing =)
My gratitude to Sister for inviting me to go on a retreat. Over there, she provided me with much guidance on Dhamma and about facing some of my innermost self that i turned away from subconsciously.
Not only that, there were times when Bhante gave small talks which i found both humorous and quick witted and yet at the same time, they were filled with messages that were full of wisdom and insight. Messages that will benefit one for a lifetime to come.
I also like to thank the residents, namely Angelina, Sudhamma, Catherine, Su Liang, Emily and Auntie as they made the extra effort to take care of my special diet as there were lots of stuff that i'm not able to take.
Many people have misgivings about retreats. Some think its lots of fun and enjoyment while some think its all strict and tough. I suppose it depends on the sort of retreat you are attending but the bottom line of a retreat is to get in touch with yourself, to hear yourself, to be mindful of the present moment, to be truly here and now, without any or as little distractions as possible.
Most time, there's morning and evening chanting sessions and thereafter, its individual time for practice with occasional interviews with Sister for guidance. Of course, we also help out with the household chores. Everyone do their part to maintain the place which serves everyone. Most importantly there, we learn to do mindful walking, mindful eating, mindful breathing and just live in the present moment, the true art to living in the present.
Its quite funny how Qin told me what she imagine a retreat will be like and when i relate to her my experience, its like worlds apart and we both had a good laugh out of that.
Oh by the way, i managed to get some shots of the Stupa there with a very blue sky adorning it. Its really quite a sight. Will post them once i'm done with the editing =)
Sunday, 20 December 2009
Trip to Sydney - Mid Jan'10
Leave has been approved for the period from 14th Jan to 22nd Jan for my trip to Aus - Sydney. For now, what is left for me to do before end of the month is to book my flight and arrange for accommodations.
Every trip to me is special and unique. For this coming trip, even more so. I will be spending a good 4 to 5 days at Aloka Meditation Centre at Peats Ridge for a retreat. Sister Sumitra has been encouraging me to set aside sometime to visit her for a retreat, to get in touch with my spiritual self. She's been mentioning to me that its good that i'm reading up on Buddhist philosophies but more important, i should start to put more practice into it and go for a proper retreat.
Its the first ever retreat i will be attending so i'm not quite sure what to expect but i believe there will be time set aside for activities such as meditation, self-reflection and dhamma talks. These are the times for practicing mindfulness, mindfulness of the current in breath and out breath, mindfulness of the present moment.
After the retreat, i intend to spend the remaining 2 or 3 days in the city itself to do some sightseeing and photography as well cos if i can, "i want to take that 3 pictures that break my heart" (if you have no idea what i'm talking about, watch the 2nd video in my previous post - Dont Be A Tourist =P
Of all, there is one thing i'm absolutely sure of, this trip, this retreat will be most nourishing to both body and mind.
Every trip to me is special and unique. For this coming trip, even more so. I will be spending a good 4 to 5 days at Aloka Meditation Centre at Peats Ridge for a retreat. Sister Sumitra has been encouraging me to set aside sometime to visit her for a retreat, to get in touch with my spiritual self. She's been mentioning to me that its good that i'm reading up on Buddhist philosophies but more important, i should start to put more practice into it and go for a proper retreat.
Its the first ever retreat i will be attending so i'm not quite sure what to expect but i believe there will be time set aside for activities such as meditation, self-reflection and dhamma talks. These are the times for practicing mindfulness, mindfulness of the current in breath and out breath, mindfulness of the present moment.
After the retreat, i intend to spend the remaining 2 or 3 days in the city itself to do some sightseeing and photography as well cos if i can, "i want to take that 3 pictures that break my heart" (if you have no idea what i'm talking about, watch the 2nd video in my previous post - Dont Be A Tourist =P
Of all, there is one thing i'm absolutely sure of, this trip, this retreat will be most nourishing to both body and mind.
Thursday, 17 December 2009
Don't Be A Tourist
Here's the series of "Don't Be A Tourist" advert clips by Kevin Spacey on Olympus Pen that really stole me. Esp the clip with the line that goes, "I don't want to take 300,000 same old pictures that break my hard drive. I want to take 3 that break my heart."
Other clips with lines like, "I don't want to be the camera guy....., 15 lenses, 3 tripods... I want to be, I don't know, camera ciao, picture wow." and "... photographs that hurt everytime you look at it..." were also done up very nicely.
And I must say, they are most excellently done as a series. Just kept going wow over them... it's just so captivating.... They didn't break my heart but they sure did touch my heart. =)
Other clips with lines like, "I don't want to be the camera guy....., 15 lenses, 3 tripods... I want to be, I don't know, camera ciao, picture wow." and "... photographs that hurt everytime you look at it..." were also done up very nicely.
And I must say, they are most excellently done as a series. Just kept going wow over them... it's just so captivating.... They didn't break my heart but they sure did touch my heart. =)
Saturday, 14 November 2009
Hidalgo - Breed and Bloodline Matters Not
Passed by Sembawang Music Store in Plaza Singapura yesterday and there's an ongoing 50% discount storewide and seeing that, i popped in for a quick look to see if there are bargains to be gotten.
And guess what, i left the store with 2 DVDs, Hidalgo and Sunshine at the cost of $17. These 2 films are not immensely popular or well received but are films that i have good impressions about having caught them on the big screen couple of years back.
Talking about Hidalgo, you can read a brief summary about its plot here - Hidalgo. Its a film that has several meaningful messages that underlines it. One of the stronger messages that came across, is that breed and bloodline does not matter, what matters more is the spirit and determination of the the sentient being, regardless of man or horse.
Does it matter if a horse is mustang and not pure breed? And does it truly matter if a man is born of a lowly station and not a royalty? What matters more is the determination and effort made to reach the final goal. Even one born of the lowest station can rise to the occasion with the right effort. Buddha has taught this numerous times, over and over again that even the lowest caste is subjected to the law of kamma and can attain enlightenment with the right effort and determination.
Here's a good quote from Shirley,James that on how transient all earthly deeds are and how are men will be brought equal ultimately ~ "The glories of our blood and state are shadows, not substantial things; There is no armour against fate; Death lays his icy hand on kings: Scepter and crown must tumble down, And in the dust be equal made with the poor crooked scythe and spade."
So not matter if you have been born blessed or surrounded by hardships, it's wonderful merits to reflect and look beyond materials, making a constant effort to better ourselves so we can bring liberation, love, peace and joy to the people around us. With metta.
And guess what, i left the store with 2 DVDs, Hidalgo and Sunshine at the cost of $17. These 2 films are not immensely popular or well received but are films that i have good impressions about having caught them on the big screen couple of years back.
Talking about Hidalgo, you can read a brief summary about its plot here - Hidalgo. Its a film that has several meaningful messages that underlines it. One of the stronger messages that came across, is that breed and bloodline does not matter, what matters more is the spirit and determination of the the sentient being, regardless of man or horse.
Does it matter if a horse is mustang and not pure breed? And does it truly matter if a man is born of a lowly station and not a royalty? What matters more is the determination and effort made to reach the final goal. Even one born of the lowest station can rise to the occasion with the right effort. Buddha has taught this numerous times, over and over again that even the lowest caste is subjected to the law of kamma and can attain enlightenment with the right effort and determination.
Here's a good quote from Shirley,James that on how transient all earthly deeds are and how are men will be brought equal ultimately ~ "The glories of our blood and state are shadows, not substantial things; There is no armour against fate; Death lays his icy hand on kings: Scepter and crown must tumble down, And in the dust be equal made with the poor crooked scythe and spade."
So not matter if you have been born blessed or surrounded by hardships, it's wonderful merits to reflect and look beyond materials, making a constant effort to better ourselves so we can bring liberation, love, peace and joy to the people around us. With metta.
Saturday, 7 November 2009
Change - You or Me?
Was chatting with Phyllis a few days back and she popped an interesting question? She asked, "Is it my perception that has changed or did the other party truly changed when i find that someone has changed?"
My answer for that ~ Both. Why both? Its pretty simple, change is a constant for both parties. Our perception is constantly changing and being shaped with each and every passing moment we experience in our lives. At the same time, so are the people around us, they too are constantly changing. Their thoughts and behaviour being shaped by each past experience they have in the very same moment too.
But why is it that we feel so strongly that someone has changed at a certain point in time but not the rest or not at other times? The key words are attention and noticeable.
Firstly, we do not pay attention to the changes that are occuring this very moment which we consider inconsequential and when we do pay attention, we realise that a lot has passed us by. Secondly, is that the change in either ourselves or the other person is drastic enough that it becomes noticeable, so resulting in the way we view the other party, giving rise to the very question itself ~ did we change or did he/she change?
Just some of my reflections on changes =)
My answer for that ~ Both. Why both? Its pretty simple, change is a constant for both parties. Our perception is constantly changing and being shaped with each and every passing moment we experience in our lives. At the same time, so are the people around us, they too are constantly changing. Their thoughts and behaviour being shaped by each past experience they have in the very same moment too.
But why is it that we feel so strongly that someone has changed at a certain point in time but not the rest or not at other times? The key words are attention and noticeable.
Firstly, we do not pay attention to the changes that are occuring this very moment which we consider inconsequential and when we do pay attention, we realise that a lot has passed us by. Secondly, is that the change in either ourselves or the other person is drastic enough that it becomes noticeable, so resulting in the way we view the other party, giving rise to the very question itself ~ did we change or did he/she change?
Just some of my reflections on changes =)
Let's Make Our World The Most Beautiful Home
Nice music video by our very own National Environment Agency and the title speaks for itself. Let's all do our little part and make our world a little better by being more conscious in reducing waste =)
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